It's almost Halloween, which means that it's the month of horror films. Movie companies love these things, because they can just crank out sequels to these over and over again to get box office cash.
Note: There are a lot of good standalone horror films or movies with one or two sequels out there. They don't make the list because they're not really "franchise"-ey enough.
10. Scream - The Scream franchise sort of "brought horror films back" after years of them getting worse and worse, fading from real horror into more comical, slapstick Chucky and Freddy nonsense. So I guess it can get some credit for that. On the downside, it was so successful that afterwards everyone had to now put up with an unrelenting, non-stop series of Conjuring, Final Destination, and Paranormal Activity films.
9. Resident Evil - Can a video game movie franchise really count as great horror films? It can if I get to seeing Milla Jovovich's hot ass killing things with machine guns. These movies didn't even really need to be linked to the video games. They should have just named the films "Milla Jovovich's Hot Ass Killing Things with Machine Guns" and they still would have made thirty kabillion dollars.
8. Saw - There are pretty terrible films overall, but hey... Cary Elwes!
7. Jaws - I'm not sure the Jaws films are really "horror" in the ways many of the other films are horror. But as I was researching, Jaws kept coming up on all the lists as a horror film. Okay. Sure. Let's go with that. The first one is the only one that's really watchable though. I mean... sure... the other ones are "so bad they're good," I guess. Especially whichever one had Dennis Quaid and Lea Thompson at SeaWorld Orlando. HOW THE FUCK DID A GREAT WHITE SHARK GET TO ORLANDO?! THAT MAKES NO SENSE!
6. The Exorcist - Yeah, these films are pretty terrifying, huh? But like with Jaws - even though it tried to be a franchise, it was more like a really famous first one, followed by mediocrity.
5. A Nightmare on Elm Street - It started as a good/scary franchise that ultimately waned off into ludicrous, campy territory where Freddy was just a joke delivery machine. Oh well.
4. Halloween - These are pretty good/scary, although let's all get together and agree that Halloween III: Season of the Witch doesn't exist and never happened.
3. Alien - These are pretty good/scary, although let's all get together and agree that Prometheus doesn't exist and never happened. Sigourney Weaver running around in a spaceship in her panties though? Yeah, that happened!
2. Friday the 13th - Are these films actually better than the Alien films? No, of course not. But Jason is the best horror film villain ever, and he is so damn iconic. I'm pretty sure they just had to completely change hockey goalie masks after these films because Jason just stole the look and made it his. When are children going to learn that if they have sex at camp they are going to get brutally murdered?
1. The Evil Dead - These are the best. The first two are legitimately scary and insane. And full of blood. So. Much. Blood. The third one, Army of Darkness, is... well... not really a horror film anymore. But it's still, like, so amazing. In hindsight, the Academy Awards should just retroactively give every Oscar ever to Bruce Campbell's chin.
Note: There are a lot of good standalone horror films or movies with one or two sequels out there. They don't make the list because they're not really "franchise"-ey enough.
10. Scream - The Scream franchise sort of "brought horror films back" after years of them getting worse and worse, fading from real horror into more comical, slapstick Chucky and Freddy nonsense. So I guess it can get some credit for that. On the downside, it was so successful that afterwards everyone had to now put up with an unrelenting, non-stop series of Conjuring, Final Destination, and Paranormal Activity films.
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| Almost makes you forget about this. |
8. Saw - There are pretty terrible films overall, but hey... Cary Elwes!
7. Jaws - I'm not sure the Jaws films are really "horror" in the ways many of the other films are horror. But as I was researching, Jaws kept coming up on all the lists as a horror film. Okay. Sure. Let's go with that. The first one is the only one that's really watchable though. I mean... sure... the other ones are "so bad they're good," I guess. Especially whichever one had Dennis Quaid and Lea Thompson at SeaWorld Orlando. HOW THE FUCK DID A GREAT WHITE SHARK GET TO ORLANDO?! THAT MAKES NO SENSE!
6. The Exorcist - Yeah, these films are pretty terrifying, huh? But like with Jaws - even though it tried to be a franchise, it was more like a really famous first one, followed by mediocrity.
5. A Nightmare on Elm Street - It started as a good/scary franchise that ultimately waned off into ludicrous, campy territory where Freddy was just a joke delivery machine. Oh well.
4. Halloween - These are pretty good/scary, although let's all get together and agree that Halloween III: Season of the Witch doesn't exist and never happened.
3. Alien - These are pretty good/scary, although let's all get together and agree that Prometheus doesn't exist and never happened. Sigourney Weaver running around in a spaceship in her panties though? Yeah, that happened!
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| Seems friendly enough. |
1. The Evil Dead - These are the best. The first two are legitimately scary and insane. And full of blood. So. Much. Blood. The third one, Army of Darkness, is... well... not really a horror film anymore. But it's still, like, so amazing. In hindsight, the Academy Awards should just retroactively give every Oscar ever to Bruce Campbell's chin.
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