Ed Ranks the 1914 Boston Braves Pitching Staff by Other Things They Could Have Been

Fun Fact: Everyone in this picture has been dead for decades.

Hey! This is my 150th Ranking. Does that mean anything special? Of course not.

In 1914, the Boston "Miracle" Braves swept the Philadelphia Athletics to win the World Series. These twelve pitchers below played for the Braves that season.  But I'm not ranking the pitchers by their athletic ability, fame, or anything like that. I'm ranking them by other things they could have been, based on their names.

Does that make sense to you? I don't care.

12. Tom Hughes - Could have been anybody really, since this is a super boring name that I'm sure a million people have had.

11. Gene Cocreham - Could have been the name of some prospector hunting for gold during the rush of 1849 and famous for shouting, "Thars gold in them thar hills!"

10. Paul Strand - Could have been the founder of the Strand Magazine, the famous monthly magazine composed of short fiction and general interest articles. However, the magazine was named after the famous street in London, not a person.

9. Hub Perdue - Could have been the name for the Salisbury, Maryland "hub" of Perdue Farms. Yeah, that's right, the chicken company.

8. Lefty Tyler - Could have been Steven Tyler's nickname if he wound up being a guitarist in Aerosmith, instead of being the singer. Also, if he was left-handed. I'm pretty sure he's right-handed. I didn't heavily research this, but all the Google images of him appear to have him holding the microphone stand in his right hand.

7. Dick Rudolph - Could have been the one of the nicknames that all of the other reindeer called the red-nosed one. After all, they did "used to laugh and call him names." You gotta imagine that the reindeer came up with even worse stuff than that.

6. Otto Hess - Could have been the name of one of the Chancellors of Germany under the reign of Kaiser Wilhelm II. But he wasn't. He was a baseball pitcher.

5. Ensign Cottrell - Could have been the Bajoran character played by Michelle Forbes in seasons 5-7 of Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's not. That was Ensign Ro.

4. Dolf Luque - Could have been a handsome German-Cuban actor from the 1950's who tried to become a leading man in cinema. Unfortunately, due to the stereotypes and racism of the era, his "ethnic" identity relegated him to only playing supporting bad guys roles in Westerns like Rawhide and Gunsmoke.

3. Dick Crutcher - Could have been the name of some special device used to care for a penile fracture after someone ruptures their tunica albuginea. I hope there is some sort of device to help out with this. I'm not sure what it's actually called though.

2. "Seattle Bill" James - Could have been the name of one of outlaw Jesse James' younger brothers. However, rather than being caught in a life of crime he could have moved out west to the Washington Territory as an earlier settler.  He, ironically, also could have served as a lawman that negotiated treaties with the local Chinookan peoples. Eventually, his notoriety as a James brother who lived as a "frontier lawman" out with Native Americans could have guaranteed him a spot as a regular celebrity performer in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show. But none of that is true. I know that sounded pretty convincing to you, but I made it up. These are all just deceased baseball players.
 
1. Iron Davis - Could have been the name of the winning-est fighter in the 1989-1996 athletic competition television program American Gladiators. Iron Davis is an awesome damn name.