16. Steve Johnson - There is no name on this earth less funny than "Steve Johnson." Not even having a last name that is slang for penis is helping this guy be less boring sounding.
15. Richard Anderson - Still boring. This name isn't making anybody laugh.
14. Charles Jones - The only thing which makes this funny is if you think that maybe he went by "Chuck" and is hence "Chuck Jones." If that were true, then it would sort of be funny because you could mix him up with the Looney Tunes guy.
13. Jim Paxson - I am almost certain that this is the name of Bobby Cannavale's policeman character in Ant Man. But other than that, there is nothing funny about this name. WHY DO I KNOW THIS FACTOID?
12. Mike Holton - Marginally funnier than Jim Paxson, I suppose. Still not particularly hilarious though.
11. Terry Porter - Slightly funny to me, but only because there was a teacher named Mr. Porter at my high school and this made me think of him yelling at people to not drop the T-square in our architectural design class.
10. Jerome Kersey - I'm pretty neutral about whether this name is funny or not. It's certainly not as funny as the fact that the Trail Blazers drafted injury-prone Sam Bowie ahead of Michael Jordan in 1984.
8. Kevin Gamble - I guess it could be a funny name if your family hasn't been torn apart by a relative with a serious gambling problem. Or maybe it's even funnier if it has been. I suppose it just depends on your sense of humor.
8. Kevin Duckworth - Duckworth is a little but funny. This is a name with an animal in it. And ducks are inherently funny animals. They just are. Don't question it.
7. Clyde Drexler - "Clyde" is a funny name because you know that if your parents named you that then you will never own a t-shirt nicer than a mustard-stained wifebeater.
6. Maurice Lucas - Maurice is a funny name. Don't lie and say you don't laugh about people being named Maurice. And I thought it was funny before I thought of that some people might call him the Space Cowboy.
5. Ronnie Murphy - Hahahaha. Ronnie! Ronnie is a hilarious name. Is anyone under 50 named Ronnie or if you're named Ronnie you're just born an old person?
4. Caldwell Jones - This one is funny because it does not sound like a Portland Trail Blazer at all. It sounds like the name of a bank or insurance company or law firm. I am almost certain that I see ads on TV telling me that I need to switch over to Caldwell Jones for all my financing needs.
3. Jerry Sichting - Sichting is funny. What kind of a last name is that? It's like someone just used a game of Boggle at Ellis Island to create stupid names.
2. Nikita Wilson - HAHAHA, YOU HAVE A GIRL'S NAME, NIKITA!
1. Kiki Vandeweghe - I am pretty sure that Kiki Vandeweghe is also the name of a Dutch hooker in the Amsterdam red light district.
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