Ed Ranks Forest Whitaker’s Eyes

Another Jacobite claimant!

Hey look, we all realize this list is going to be short. Just be glad I’m not talking about the Olympics anymore.  So why talk about Forest Whitaker? I dunno. Pick a reason. Black Panther was great. Maybe they just re-ran The Crying Game on cable. That’s a pretty sweet movie, right? And how about that hot chick in it? So hot! Oh, by the way--I’ve only ever seen half of that film. I wonder how it all winds up with her. 

ANYWAAAAAAY…

3. Third Eye – This is Forest’s gate that leads to inner realms and spaces of higher consciousness and enlightenment. Or it would be, if it existed. But it doesn’t exist. Forget that dharmic stuff. So let’s rank this one last.

2. Wonky Eye – You know exactly what I’m talking about.

1. Normal Eye - Forest Whitaker’s normal, regular eye that works properly is clearly his best eye.

Hope you enjoyed this ranking!