You know this rug. You've seen this rug before. Chances are, you had this rug. Here are the things on it, ranked.
18. No Fucking Clue (C) - What is this? It's a tiny parking lot with a red box next to it. Even zooming in on a higher-quality image of this carpet gives me no idea as to what this small, red box (on a small pole) is supposed to be.
17. Apartment Complex? (B) - This one is cut off, so I'm not 100% sure it's an apartment. But it looks like it is. Right?
16. Bus Stop (O) - Odd choice, but okay. Public transportation is a good thing to have. Kids would probably prefer a train station though. Maybe we can pretend that L is a train station, but the tracks are cut off.
15. Uhh... Other School? (L) - Since I've decided that K (see below) is already a school... I'm not sure what L is supposed to represent. Is it ANOTHER school? Or maybe it's a high school while K is an elementary school. Geez, I dunno. Maybe it's a mansion?
14. Office Building, I suppose (D) - This one is tall..Let's say it's an office!
13. Burger Restaurant? (A) - I'm not actually sure what this is. The white sign on the side is vaguely shaped like a hamburger. So I'm guessing this is like they're generic McDonalds. Or maybe not.
12. Post Office & Phone Booth (I) - I would assume this is just a house, except that it has an envelope on it. And what's up with the phone booth? That's a blast from the past, huh?
11. Hot Dog Stand? (M) - Hot dog stand is my only guess for what the hell this is, with accompanying seating with umbrellas. If it's not that, I don't know what it is.
10. Church (G) - With two steeples, obviously representing Peter and Paul, respectively. If I'm going to speculate other things about this church without evidence, I might as well make up some other juicy shit. For example, this church was one of the places that the Catholics shuffled a molesting priest to back in day, when they kept moving them all around to avoid making the news. It's a good thing that the staff of the Boston Globe (Hulk, Batman, Christine Palmer, Sabretooth, and Howard Stark) uncovered at that shit. Yeah, Spotlight had a lot of comic book movie actors in it.
9. Airport (Q) - No damn way is this ho-dink town with barely any housing deserving of a major airport. And that is a major airport. Look at that plane! That's like a big-ass Boeing 737. That's no regional puddle jumper. Fun for a kid to play with, but impractical!
8. Houses (R) - So apparently someone lives here after all. A whole three damn row houses.
7. Parking Lot (H) - Pretty boring, though I suppose this town needs some parking. For practicality of what this floor mat is, I guess this makes sense. Kids will have a bunch of toy cars to play with, and parking extra toy cars here is this spot is cool. I would have never ranked a parking lot so high otherwise without this fact. It's sort of a free-for-all "dump all your favorite cars here on the map" zone that allows a kid to have a lot of cars out.
6. Park / Playground (E) - Rather than defining this pond, a picnic of people under an umbrella, and a swing set as three different things, I'm going to go ahead and say that all three together form Park Slash Playground.
5. Auto Repair Shop (F) - This is pretty recognizable, but the scale is wrong. How can this auto repair shop be almost as tall as a church and office building? How high up do they need to raise these cars?
4. Hospital (J) - Yeah, seems legit. This should be here.
3. Police Station (P) - Basically every kid has a toy police car among their collection of cars, so this (along with fire truck and hospital) are a must.
2. School (K) - Nobody seems to even live in this town since there are barely any damn houses. So I'm not sure why it needs a school. But yeah, I guess putting a school on a play rug for kids is important. Also, this school is designed so that it has two towers that look like pencils! How cool would that actually be if you went to a castle-looking school with pencil towers.
1. Fire Station (N) - If you made a children's play mat to look like a town, and it DIDN'T have a fire station on it, I believe you could legally be arrested.
18. No Fucking Clue (C) - What is this? It's a tiny parking lot with a red box next to it. Even zooming in on a higher-quality image of this carpet gives me no idea as to what this small, red box (on a small pole) is supposed to be.
17. Apartment Complex? (B) - This one is cut off, so I'm not 100% sure it's an apartment. But it looks like it is. Right?
16. Bus Stop (O) - Odd choice, but okay. Public transportation is a good thing to have. Kids would probably prefer a train station though. Maybe we can pretend that L is a train station, but the tracks are cut off.
15. Uhh... Other School? (L) - Since I've decided that K (see below) is already a school... I'm not sure what L is supposed to represent. Is it ANOTHER school? Or maybe it's a high school while K is an elementary school. Geez, I dunno. Maybe it's a mansion?
14. Office Building, I suppose (D) - This one is tall..Let's say it's an office!
13. Burger Restaurant? (A) - I'm not actually sure what this is. The white sign on the side is vaguely shaped like a hamburger. So I'm guessing this is like they're generic McDonalds. Or maybe not.
12. Post Office & Phone Booth (I) - I would assume this is just a house, except that it has an envelope on it. And what's up with the phone booth? That's a blast from the past, huh?
11. Hot Dog Stand? (M) - Hot dog stand is my only guess for what the hell this is, with accompanying seating with umbrellas. If it's not that, I don't know what it is.
10. Church (G) - With two steeples, obviously representing Peter and Paul, respectively. If I'm going to speculate other things about this church without evidence, I might as well make up some other juicy shit. For example, this church was one of the places that the Catholics shuffled a molesting priest to back in day, when they kept moving them all around to avoid making the news. It's a good thing that the staff of the Boston Globe (Hulk, Batman, Christine Palmer, Sabretooth, and Howard Stark) uncovered at that shit. Yeah, Spotlight had a lot of comic book movie actors in it.
9. Airport (Q) - No damn way is this ho-dink town with barely any housing deserving of a major airport. And that is a major airport. Look at that plane! That's like a big-ass Boeing 737. That's no regional puddle jumper. Fun for a kid to play with, but impractical!
8. Houses (R) - So apparently someone lives here after all. A whole three damn row houses.
7. Parking Lot (H) - Pretty boring, though I suppose this town needs some parking. For practicality of what this floor mat is, I guess this makes sense. Kids will have a bunch of toy cars to play with, and parking extra toy cars here is this spot is cool. I would have never ranked a parking lot so high otherwise without this fact. It's sort of a free-for-all "dump all your favorite cars here on the map" zone that allows a kid to have a lot of cars out.
6. Park / Playground (E) - Rather than defining this pond, a picnic of people under an umbrella, and a swing set as three different things, I'm going to go ahead and say that all three together form Park Slash Playground.
5. Auto Repair Shop (F) - This is pretty recognizable, but the scale is wrong. How can this auto repair shop be almost as tall as a church and office building? How high up do they need to raise these cars?
4. Hospital (J) - Yeah, seems legit. This should be here.
3. Police Station (P) - Basically every kid has a toy police car among their collection of cars, so this (along with fire truck and hospital) are a must.
2. School (K) - Nobody seems to even live in this town since there are barely any damn houses. So I'm not sure why it needs a school. But yeah, I guess putting a school on a play rug for kids is important. Also, this school is designed so that it has two towers that look like pencils! How cool would that actually be if you went to a castle-looking school with pencil towers.
1. Fire Station (N) - If you made a children's play mat to look like a town, and it DIDN'T have a fire station on it, I believe you could legally be arrested.
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