Ed Ranks Wrestling PPV Show Names that ChatGPT Came Up With

Random Sasha Banks picture works for me. 

While we're on the topic of ChatGPT, I told it to come up with the name of a new Wrestling Pay Per View event (or as they're often being branded these, days, "Premium Live Event.")   Why? Because the WWE's next such event, "Elimination Chamber," is coming up this weekend. And that is a TERRIBLE NAME. I mean it's just awful. Can ChatGPT do better? 

The answer? 

No. Not really. 

But it tried. So here are the 10 awful names it came up with, and as bad as "Elimination Chamber" is, I'm not sure any of these are any better. Maybe #1. 

 10. Havoc Havens

Descripted by ChatGPT as "inside the ring, chaos reigns supreme as wrestlers navigate through a labyrinth of obstacles and traps."  This, I assume, just grabbed the name of WCW's Halloween Havoc, which only had the "Havoc" name to be alliteritive with the fact that it was the October PPV, and lost the October / Halloween theme, so now it's... Havoc Havens? Just alliterative for no reason? 

9. FuryFest

The description for this one prioduced by the AI was so generic it isn't even worth mentioning. And while the name itself conceptually isn't too bad, it's way too easy to accidently say "Furry Fest," which makes this sound like a Furry convention of people in stuffed animal suits banging each other. No thank you. 

8. MayhemMania

What a terrible name. Adding "-mania" to the end of your notional wrestling PPV is a good way to get sued by the WWE, and MayhemMania is all around a lazy name.  At least this time the ChatGPT came up with a  theme that sounded interesting - it's an all hardcore PPV with d no-holds-barred stipulations. Sure, that sounds fine. With a better name. 

7. Titan Takedown

Another way to get sued by the WWE is to put the word "Titan" in your PPV name, which was the name of the WWE parent company, at least until its merger with UFC to form TKO. Again, if you've seen articles about how ChatGPT has actually gotten lazier and dumber, this is a good example that this technology will not be taking over for humans any time soon. The dumb AI's description for this one again simply vaguely compares wrestlers to titans and talks about them fighting. Snore. 

6. ThunderDome Rumble

I never instructed ChatGPT to make these PPV names alliterative, but it did it for every single last one of them... except for this one. ThunderDome Rumble is not alliterative, however it does blindly steal from the name of a Mad Max movie, as well as an old WCW match type that was sort of a precursor to a Hell in a Hell match. At least the AI description for this one describes the action as happening "inside the ThunderDome," but beyond that doesn't say much interesting. I think the Tina Turner estate would need to get money if anyone used this name. 

5. Rampage Rumble

You can't just take "AEW Rampage" and "Royal Rumble" and mash them up and make something even less interesting. Or I guess you can. 

4. Savage Showdown

Okay, this isn't among the worst of the worst, but again I never really asked for alliteration, but it decided I was getting it. If you say the word "Savage" though, I think of Randy Savage. So this should be his show. Only he's dead so it can't be. Death sucks. 

3. Brutal Bash

Brutal Bash is no "Bash at the Beach," which it clearly stole its name from, but it's sort of heading in the right direction. Is this name better than "Elimination Chamber?" Not really. But getting there.

2. Adrenaline Assault

Another alliterative suggestion. Another vague description that says absolurtely nothing. I keep saying that, but here is an example of what I mean: “Adrenaline Assault is a pulse-pounding extravaganza featuring non-stop action and adrenaline-fueled showdowns. Every match is designed to keep fans on the edge of their seats as wrestlers unleash their most daring and high-flying maneuvers in pursuit of victory.” Do you know what that says? NOTHING. So many words to say nothing. The name itself? Okay. It’s fine. It might be just as good as Elimination Chamber.

 1. Apocalypse Arena

Apocalypse Arena is the only suggestion from ChatGPT that sounds remotely cool. I could totally replace about half of the boring wrestling PPV names with something called the Apocalypse Arena. Once more, the AI did a bad job explaining the event other than a gobbledygook (easy now, NOT Gobbledy Gooker) of words. However, I’d like to think maybe the whole arena is set up with some cyberpunk post-apocalyptic themes and it’s basically like a Meow Wolf art show for the fans. But for the matches itself, there are several fights happening in something like a “DOOMSDAY CAGE” or something. What is a Doomsday Cage? I don’t know. I’d ask ChatGPT  to come up with something, but it’s pretty lazy and worthless. So for the next ranking, let’s return to human beings writing stuff, eh?