12. Oscar Pistorius - A filthy murderer. I looked at all the evidence and he didn't have a leg to stand on (I stole the joke from my own Facebook page from 2013, so it's okay).
11. Isaac Mizrahi - This guy's pretty annoying too, but he hasn't killed anybody (that we know about). He did molest all those actresses at the 2006 Golden Globes though. Remember that? No. Okay, moving on...
10. Oscar de la Renta - Not to be confused with Oscar De la Hoya. You could box this guy and win easily. Especially because he's dead. RIP
9. Isaac (bible) - All other Isaacs are named after him, so you think he'd be ranked pretty high. But Isaac didn't really do anything. Other than his dad almost sacrificing him, there isn't much of his own story told. The bible quickly moves on with more begat-ing and forgets all about him.
8. Oscar Bluth - Man that Jeffrey Tambor is funny, right?
7. Isaac Hayes - In the end, the whole Scientology thing knocks him down a bit, but you can't discount all those years that he was the king of cool.
6. Oscar De la Hoya - Not to be confused with Oscar de la Renta. Do not try to box this guy. You will lose, unless you are already a boxer yourself.
5. Chris Isaak - Yes, technically it's spelled slightly different. Big deal! It's not like Bible Isaac guy was actually spelled the English way. This guy had that one song, remember? Yeah. Pretty good. And he was on Twin Peaks or something, right? Look, the 90's were a while ago, I forget.
4. Isaac Asimov - Ever seen a good sci-fi movie? It's probably based on a book written this guy, either an outright adaption or just via lazy stealing of ideas.
3. Oscar the Grouch - This dude loves himself some trash. Anything dirty or dingy or dusty. Anything ragged or rotten or rusty.
2. Isaac Newton - The most influential thinker of the scientific revolution. Formulated the laws of motion and universal gravitation that finally explained ancient mysteries including comets, other celestial bodies, the tides, and the equinoxes. Laid the foundations for classical mechanics and optics. Helped develop calculus. Built the first practical reflecting telescope. Developed the theory of color based on his studies of prisms dividing light into the many colors of the visible spectrum. These are just a small sample of the things he did. What the fuck have you done with your life?
1. Oscar Isaac - This whole ranking was really just so I could post this:
11. Isaac Mizrahi - This guy's pretty annoying too, but he hasn't killed anybody (that we know about). He did molest all those actresses at the 2006 Golden Globes though. Remember that? No. Okay, moving on...
9. Isaac (bible) - All other Isaacs are named after him, so you think he'd be ranked pretty high. But Isaac didn't really do anything. Other than his dad almost sacrificing him, there isn't much of his own story told. The bible quickly moves on with more begat-ing and forgets all about him.
8. Oscar Bluth - Man that Jeffrey Tambor is funny, right?
7. Isaac Hayes - In the end, the whole Scientology thing knocks him down a bit, but you can't discount all those years that he was the king of cool.
6. Oscar De la Hoya - Not to be confused with Oscar de la Renta. Do not try to box this guy. You will lose, unless you are already a boxer yourself.
4. Isaac Asimov - Ever seen a good sci-fi movie? It's probably based on a book written this guy, either an outright adaption or just via lazy stealing of ideas.
2. Isaac Newton - The most influential thinker of the scientific revolution. Formulated the laws of motion and universal gravitation that finally explained ancient mysteries including comets, other celestial bodies, the tides, and the equinoxes. Laid the foundations for classical mechanics and optics. Helped develop calculus. Built the first practical reflecting telescope. Developed the theory of color based on his studies of prisms dividing light into the many colors of the visible spectrum. These are just a small sample of the things he did. What the fuck have you done with your life?
1. Oscar Isaac - This whole ranking was really just so I could post this:
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