"Deus ex Machina" translates as "god from the machine," and its concept originates in a number of ancient Greek plays where the gods swoop down at the end to resolve the story. Although more specifically in this day and age -- the term has come to mean any plot device whereby a seemingly unsolvable problem is suddenly resolved by an unexpected event. Let's talk about these shitty plot devices, shall we?
10. (Tie) A million different films where "the cavalry" arrives just in time. And "cavalry" doesn't have to specifically refer to a horsed military unit, but that's basically what I'm getting at. Like the rest of the American forces showing up at the end of Saving Private Ryan. Or the forces showing up at the end of Jurassic Park III. Or the blue Smurf cat people showing up at the end of Avatar. Or the Excelsior showing up at the end of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country. You get the picture. Although this is verging less on "Deus ex Machina" and more on "poor story-writing that relies on coincidences for drama." Speaking of which, I should write one of these lists about movies that rely on unbelievable coincidences to push the story forward. Maybe one day.
9. The Dark Knight. Even good films can suffer from the Deus ex Machina. Oh hey look, Batman created a machine that can transform every cell phone into a sonar system that will allow him to track down the Joker! Let's very quickly note the fact that there are horrible moral implications to this technology and then immediately blow up the machine that does it to avoid the consequences of those very moral implications. This one is ranked fairly low with regards to "annoying" though because, as noted, it still is a good film. And a truly annoying Deus ex Machina comes out of nowhere. This one at least made an effort by foreshadowing the technology earlier in the film. Which sort of means this one is also sort of a Chekhov's gun. I'm not explaining that one, look it up yourself. And no, it has nothing to do with Star Trek.
8. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. Those damn eagles showing up was really annoying. Is this technically just the same thing as #10 again? Yeah. But this one needs to be pointed out because how stupid it is and because how it negates the entire journey of the film series. Some fans point out that the eagles were supposed to be ornery and not really take orders that well as a justification, but that's just a lame defense. Again, fine film. It completely swept all 11 Academy Awards for which it was nominated, including Best Picture. And it's really the source material's fault. But still. Lame.
7. Raiders of the Lost Ark. This "god from the machine" was actually God. So it has that going for it. Still, the Ark in this film is an amazing combination of MacGuffin and Deus Ex Machina combined together. It's like Lucas and Spielberg lazily glanced at TVTropes.com prior to writing the end. And I know the internet didn't exist in the 70s, but that's what it's like. TVTropes was probably a book back then or something, right? Just like how your parents had that Leonard Maltin's Movie Guide book before IMDB existed. Remember those? Do you think they still sell them? Maybe as tinder to help start your fireplace in the winter.
6. The Wizard of Oz. So wait, was this all a dream or what? Even if it wasn't a dream and it did happen - tapping magic shoes to go home still sucks.
5. Star Trek Into Darkness. I believe I have mentioned before about how this film is awful. The original Star Trek film series had an epic two movie story about a feud with Khan, Spock's tragic death, and resurrection. It was well-paced and the use of the "Genesis Device" made for a plot that built onto itself and wound up at a sensible conclusion. This crapfest however, decided to just go with "how about we just make Khan's blood magic." And did the writers even think of the repercussions of this development? Khan's magic blood should just make everyone immortal now in the entire universe, huh?
4. Independence Day. Good thing those shitty aliens have shitty1990s Mac-based computer systems running their shitty spaceship, or else that shitty computer virus uploaded by Dr. Ian Malcolm would have never worked. See what I did there? Ian Malcolm was a completely different film. I am a comic genius.
3. The Matrix Revolutions. This one tried to be cute by actually pointing out that the Deus ex Machina was a Deus ex Machina by naming it "Deus ex Machina." But if the Matrix film series was any good (which it isn't after the first one), the Deus ex Machina would have been hinted at prior to it showing up at the end of Part III as a Deus ex Machina. But it never was, which just makes it a fucking lazy Deus ex Machina. And technically, the only good Matrix film (again, the first one) also sort of ended with a Deus ex Machina by Neo suddenly just "realizing" that he didn't have to die in the Matrix because... uhm... Trinity loved him or something. I dunno. Still, I'm not criticizing that one. It was awesome.
2. (Tie) War of the Worlds / Signs / Attack of the Killer Tomatoes / Mars Attacks. I hate this one, and I want to specifically point out how awful these four film endings are. This is the "enemies defeated by unexpectedly simple thing that is absolutely prevalent" ending. In War of the Worlds, the aliens were killed because they were allergic to a bacteria on Earth. Which the aliens should have looked into before they invaded. Again, you have to blame the source writer one for that though rather than the film itself. Signs took this exact same stupid alien invasion concept and made it stupider by making the thing that killed the aliens water. I can see some stupid aliens not thinking too hard about bacteria - but it should have been pretty damn obvious for them to not invade a planet made up mostly of the very thing that kills them. And speaking of water killing the villain... how about that #6 again too, huh? Oh, and let's not forget the cult classic Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, where the aforementioned fruits (don't argue with me about this) were killed by really bad music. Which was a super-lame ending. But not as bad as when Mars Attacks used the exact same plot device, making it a bastardized mashup of the worst parts of War of the Worlds (martians attacking and being killed by something dumb) and AotKT (bad music being that something done).
1. Superman (1978). Spinning the Earth backwards to turn time backwards is the stupidest fucking thing that has ever been done in the history of cinema. And that includes making Jessie Spano a pole-licking stripper. Neither Antonio Banderas nor Lucy Liu ever turned the world backwards in Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever, thus making Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever an indisputably better movie than Superman: The Movie. The original ending was supposed to be Superman punching the missile into space and accidentally opening the Phantom Zone and releasing Zod and crew, thus naturally introducing the villains to the sequel. Which would have been infinitely cooler. However, even had that original vision have held... the ending of Superman II (which was being filmed simultaneously) was supposed to have still been the stupid time backwards thing. So one way or another this terrible ending would have happened. Despite its criticism, Man of Steel has a masterpiece ending in comparison. I'm sure Debbie Does Dallas does as well, although I have no idea how that one actually ends. I can make an educated guess though.
The film Ex Machina actually has nothing to do with this list of Deus ex Machina plot devises, but I feel it's important to include this video again anyway.
10. (Tie) A million different films where "the cavalry" arrives just in time. And "cavalry" doesn't have to specifically refer to a horsed military unit, but that's basically what I'm getting at. Like the rest of the American forces showing up at the end of Saving Private Ryan. Or the forces showing up at the end of Jurassic Park III. Or the blue Smurf cat people showing up at the end of Avatar. Or the Excelsior showing up at the end of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country. You get the picture. Although this is verging less on "Deus ex Machina" and more on "poor story-writing that relies on coincidences for drama." Speaking of which, I should write one of these lists about movies that rely on unbelievable coincidences to push the story forward. Maybe one day.
9. The Dark Knight. Even good films can suffer from the Deus ex Machina. Oh hey look, Batman created a machine that can transform every cell phone into a sonar system that will allow him to track down the Joker! Let's very quickly note the fact that there are horrible moral implications to this technology and then immediately blow up the machine that does it to avoid the consequences of those very moral implications. This one is ranked fairly low with regards to "annoying" though because, as noted, it still is a good film. And a truly annoying Deus ex Machina comes out of nowhere. This one at least made an effort by foreshadowing the technology earlier in the film. Which sort of means this one is also sort of a Chekhov's gun. I'm not explaining that one, look it up yourself. And no, it has nothing to do with Star Trek.
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| The stars of the two-minute Director's Cut of LoTR |
7. Raiders of the Lost Ark. This "god from the machine" was actually God. So it has that going for it. Still, the Ark in this film is an amazing combination of MacGuffin and Deus Ex Machina combined together. It's like Lucas and Spielberg lazily glanced at TVTropes.com prior to writing the end. And I know the internet didn't exist in the 70s, but that's what it's like. TVTropes was probably a book back then or something, right? Just like how your parents had that Leonard Maltin's Movie Guide book before IMDB existed. Remember those? Do you think they still sell them? Maybe as tinder to help start your fireplace in the winter.
6. The Wizard of Oz. So wait, was this all a dream or what? Even if it wasn't a dream and it did happen - tapping magic shoes to go home still sucks.
5. Star Trek Into Darkness. I believe I have mentioned before about how this film is awful. The original Star Trek film series had an epic two movie story about a feud with Khan, Spock's tragic death, and resurrection. It was well-paced and the use of the "Genesis Device" made for a plot that built onto itself and wound up at a sensible conclusion. This crapfest however, decided to just go with "how about we just make Khan's blood magic." And did the writers even think of the repercussions of this development? Khan's magic blood should just make everyone immortal now in the entire universe, huh?
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| All space locust motherships run on Mac OS 7.5.3 |
3. The Matrix Revolutions. This one tried to be cute by actually pointing out that the Deus ex Machina was a Deus ex Machina by naming it "Deus ex Machina." But if the Matrix film series was any good (which it isn't after the first one), the Deus ex Machina would have been hinted at prior to it showing up at the end of Part III as a Deus ex Machina. But it never was, which just makes it a fucking lazy Deus ex Machina. And technically, the only good Matrix film (again, the first one) also sort of ended with a Deus ex Machina by Neo suddenly just "realizing" that he didn't have to die in the Matrix because... uhm... Trinity loved him or something. I dunno. Still, I'm not criticizing that one. It was awesome.
2. (Tie) War of the Worlds / Signs / Attack of the Killer Tomatoes / Mars Attacks. I hate this one, and I want to specifically point out how awful these four film endings are. This is the "enemies defeated by unexpectedly simple thing that is absolutely prevalent" ending. In War of the Worlds, the aliens were killed because they were allergic to a bacteria on Earth. Which the aliens should have looked into before they invaded. Again, you have to blame the source writer one for that though rather than the film itself. Signs took this exact same stupid alien invasion concept and made it stupider by making the thing that killed the aliens water. I can see some stupid aliens not thinking too hard about bacteria - but it should have been pretty damn obvious for them to not invade a planet made up mostly of the very thing that kills them. And speaking of water killing the villain... how about that #6 again too, huh? Oh, and let's not forget the cult classic Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, where the aforementioned fruits (don't argue with me about this) were killed by really bad music. Which was a super-lame ending. But not as bad as when Mars Attacks used the exact same plot device, making it a bastardized mashup of the worst parts of War of the Worlds (martians attacking and being killed by something dumb) and AotKT (bad music being that something done).
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| I wish I could turn back time to get the 143 wasted minutes that is this film back |
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